Finally a CGM!

Finally!

I get exposed to all advanced  diabetes control devices at various famous Type One diabetics' blogs.

I am so glad that I have received my FREE CGM (continuous glucose monitoring sensor) from Subang Jaya Medical Centre today.

Thanks for the opportunity to join the WDD event of achieving "10,000 steps walk in ONE DAY". Frankly, it is kinda easy to achieve 10,000 steps in a day, if there is no lift service and I keep my Accupedo (a smart phone application) in my pants' pocket and not on my hands haha!

Just installed my CGM at 11am this morning. This is how it looks like.

Metronic iPro 2 CGM

The diabetic educator, Ms Yong told me that I am too skinny, at the end we decided to put it near my buttocks, lower waist there. I was quite nervous before installing, although she helped me throughout the process. If I am not wrong, the needle was about 8 to 10mm long (usually I use 5mm needle for my insulin injections). And of course, I always feel less afraid if I do these procedures myself :p

I won a CGM only, I can't see the graph sugar reading yet because there is no insulin pump. I can only know how's my control when I return the CGM back  to the hospital. Already talked to the DE, hopefully in the near future I can buy an insulin pump by installment payment. 

Below is the link for introduction on this iPro 2 CGM.

http://s3.amazonaws.com/transformer/flash/ipro2/hcp/index.html

Okay. How do I feel like wearing a CGM now? And I am going to wear it for a week.

I feel nothing when I was busy working. Like today, I was busy the whole day after the CGM installment until I have forgotten to check if the site is bleeding.

Now that I am free, sitting in front of the computer. I can feel something is there. When I use my hand to press lightly on this iPro 2 CGM, I can feel the needle is there, stuck into my skin. 

Pain or not? Hmmm I think Bee sting is more painful haha. It's just...a thing is there, but it doesn't bother me much.

Lets see how it goes tomorrow.
I am like a robot today or Iron-Woman? LOL

Hypoglycemia good news

I am a girl. Sometimes I do have some sweet food craving.

I get a little happy + excited when my sugar is low and when the sweet craving is there hahaha

And just now was 3.3mmol. *Okay not very too low
But a Half Cup of A&W root beer will satisfy myself a bit :p

Something "good" about being a T1DM, is that you will have the reason to drink or eat at this late time in order to satisfy yourself / save yourself hehehe

Work & T1D (1)

The last blog entry was in June?! Okay my bad...

I just finished my last semester at university. Gonna celebrate my convocation on 28th October 2013!

Was busy with these things, while I was away abandoning my blog:

Graduation trip

I went to Cameron and Hatyai Thailand. And became all so enjoyed that I think my sugar has been a little bit over-joyed too *which is bad you know

Work hunting

I went to a total of 4 job interviews and finally I got offered to work as a nutritionist in a Nova retail supplement shop in a shopping mall.

None of the hospital dietitian job asks me for an interview. *watery eyes, sighed Or maybe my mom was right, I shouldn't have written down my health status on the every resumes that I sent out. *dramatic watery eyes, sighed And I did experience during one interview that the interviewer kept on asking about my T1D side effects during Uni time and then end up wondering if I am suitable to work. *dramatic eye rolling, still sighed

So, conclusion is social stigma does exist in everywhere, including healthcare field. *dramatic tears flowing, sighed

Okay. It is understandable. It is alright. Because for the next job application, I will just delete my health status part of my resume. (Why am I so honest sometimes, argh!) By the way, I do not mean that I will lie to the interviewers about my T1D. Perhaps if they were to ask, then only I will tell. (So ya, to mention or not to mention, is optional)

I know you will ask me, so how did you get the offer at Nova since social stigma is everywhere?!

Well, it happened like this...

Interviewer: So just now you have told me about your strengths. Now can you tell me about your weaknesses?

Me: Err...my weakness...(suddenly can't think of any weaknesses, have been very confident since the interview started LOL)

Interviewer: Like punctuality? Or hard to communicate with higher education people? 

Me: (No...those are not my weaknesses *still thinking) Oh yea. I have a something, which you might see it as a weakness, but I actually see it as a strength for me to work as a nutritionist.

Interviewer: Oh really, what is it?

Me: I am a Type 1 Diabetic patient. So, I can understand what the public is interested to know about nutrition and health. Example, if one day a person with diabetic or hypertension comes to me, I know better about what they want or what they would like to know about supplements.

Interviewer: Oh that's great. Anyway, you don't like a sick person. I mean you are looking so healthy!

When you cannot eat/drink too much of food that you love

I love to drink milk. The milky creamy taste of it. Hmmmm just taste so heavenly!

At one meal time, I can finish about one carton of 1 Litre cold milk.

How good if there is no carbo-counting for milk. How good if I can drink like nobody's business.



Ya...how good if I am not a diabetic ><
Nevermind, good tasty food comes in little :)

Normal or not?

How would you describe your blood sugar control?

Normal sugar level is a hard thing to define.

Essentially normal is a hard thing to achieve.

Normal? Always high? Or low for most of the time?
It is hard for me to describe. Unless I eat the same food, having the same physical activity, same stress level every 24/7 hours.

Everyday is an exciting day with T1DM around. Unexpected surprises everyday! Keep it up, CBS! :)

4mm

BD micro-fine needle will be launching this 4mm needle soon.

I got these samples from MDES 2013. Have started using these 4mm today. 

The good thing is I can't feel a single ache while injecting with this 4mm. So small so tiny!

The bad thing is I felt insecure due to painless. I wasn't sure if I have injected or not. The insulin got inside my abdomen or not. Or, it actually leaked out?!

The first second I tear off the green closure and pulled out the needle cap to have a closer look on it.

First thought: So familiar, I must have seen this somewhere sometime before.

Have you ever got sting by a bee before?

This 4mm almost looks like the bee stinger. Similar in length and size, but not the pain score, definitely not.

I remembered I accidentally stepped on a bee at home. Went to school the next day with an elephant leg haha! I know my skin is so much thicker on my sole, but the feeling was amazing. Although the stinger was sticking just lightly on my sole.

Hi Bee Stinger, long time no see. 

This time, you seem to be of more friendly and I likeyyy you :p

Am not alone

Today I was with two T1DM boys in a room. There was a sharing session with diabetics during MDES 2013.

The feeling was so close, as if I have been searching so long, suddenly I found them who actually share the same similarity with me.

They understand...

• What hypoglycemia unawareness was all about.

• How negative feeling strikes me when I woke up realising that I went to sleep without injecting pre-bed insulin due to hypoglycemia unawareness.

• How restless I am, thinking of my sugar level all day long.

• How disgraceful some people were, judging the way I was diagnosed and the way I managed my diabetes.

• How important it is, for someone to come and hug me a little and tell me that they understand how much I have gone through.

After that sharing session, I went and approached the endocrinologist, Prof Wu who was the one organising this session.

Perhaps, I should change my insulin regime to human analog type. 

Hypoglycemia is seriously making me tired. restless.

And I really hate Yo-Yo sugar level :(

8765 hours for 5678

I went to Malaysian Diabetes Educator Society (MDES) seminar today. A fruitful day.

I learnt this from Dr Alexander, an endocrinologist from UMSC today. And these figures open up my eyes again for diabetes management. How serious diabetes can become if I do not manage it properly. Anddd ONLY I myself can do something for my diabetes in that 8765 hours.

1 Day  = 24 Hours

1 Year = 365.25 Days
One year = 8766 hours

Let's do a rough calculation. If I were to see endocrinologist 15 minutes for every visit, every three months, cumulatively would be one hour in a year. 

The other 8765 hours, I would be ON MY OWN.

For 8765 hours, I will be my own endocrinologist, dietitian, diabetes educator, pharmacist and etc.

"Why we do not have cholesterol educator or hypertension educator? Why there are only diabetes educators (DE)? Because diabetes is very complicated and it is all about educating your patients. When doctors and all other healthcare professions are absent, the patient is the one who is responsible to monitor all these by her/himself." Dr Alex

So what is 5678?

Fasting blood sugar level of 5-6 mmol/L

Non-fasting blood sugar level of 7-8 mmol/L

I will definitely remember these 8765 for 5678 for my whole life from now on.

Hypo = Sleepy?

I woke up at 5.45am this morning. And just now at 10pm, I was feeling really tired.
Wanted to inject my bed time insulin and sleep.
Check sugar. And Ta-daaaa!

Okay, now I know why I was so sleepy. Runnnn for sugar!

19th March 2007

I think...I actually have become more Optimistic, Positive, Encouraging since I got diagnosed with T1DM.

I remembered well on the day Dr Yong told my mom and I that I had diabetes. Not the usual one.

"Oh diabetes! Alright I just have to cut down eating sweets, chocolate etc. Since I do not favour sweet food much, I guess it won't be a problem and soon I will recover, as soon as I get discharged from hospital."  

I remembered I said these to myself. And I regretted very soon.

While I was in hospital, staff nurses were those who helped me to inject insulin. Finally on the last day in hospital, one nurse brought a syringe and came to my bed side. I had no idea what insulin was at that time. I just thought it was some kind of medicine for me to get recovered. Thinking to myself: After this I can go back home and go back to school tomorrow. Never bother about injections.

The nurse drew out insulin into the syringe and asked me to show up my abdomen. I was thinking: Why can't she just injects on my arms. I am totally okay with injections. But...on abdomen? Alright, just do whatever I was being told.

The next thing was, she asked me to pinch a fold of skin up and asked me to hold that syringe with cap removed. And then injected. I did not cry or yell or even refuse to complete her request.

Hmmm...Perhaps I was just too happy-go-lucky on a really "lucky" situation.

I got back home after 5 days of admission in hospital. I was given syringes and insulin.
On the first day at home, I had to inject myself using syringes before every meals. I began to feel the trouble and began to realize that this is going to be a routine. A long life routine.

Then, only I started to cry in my room alone. Because I had finally realized that I am different from others of same age now. No one is like me. I had to do all these finger pricking, drawing insulin, poking skin EVERYDAY. Infact is EVERY MEALS. Only me has to do this. Only me.

I stopped crying when I was already tired. I did not tell my mom how sad I was. How unwilling I was. I was thinking: WHY ME? Why not her, him or them?

Things were hard. Diet control was hard. Insulin triggered my appetite, I kept getting hyperglycemia >16mmol/L. I ate a lots of rice at home. Did not bother much, all I want to do was just to get satisfaction from eating.

Now 6 years I have been living with T1DM. Honestly many people asked if I feel pain during injections. I do feel pain but I tolerated this feeling. Most of the time, I do not feel pain at all with 5mm needle insulin pen. Or people always say: Oh, it has been a while, I think you can't feel pain is because you are already getting used to it.

Helloooo, I do feel pain on some injections okay. Is just that pain or not pain, I still have to inject insulin in order to survive okay! *eye rolls

But they were right. I am getting used to it now. It's like a daily task, like sleeping, breathing, walking, seeing, hearing and etc. It has became a norm for me. Though, this task is still considered as an extra work for others who look at me differently.

Ya it is an EXTRA. I called this as an EXTRA-ordinary disease :)

Embarrassed moment

Today, as usual went to PPUKM hospital for dietetics posting.

Morning time I had hyperglycemia of 10.1mmol/L. So I have eaten less breakfast, so that my sugar can have enough of insulin to go down the graph into the normal range.

Well, things did not turn up like what I wished. I went hypo while counselling a patient.

That counselling session was an easy case:

"A 23 years old female, Indian, vegetarian coming in as an overweight person and diagnosed with PCOS, referred to dietitian for weight reducing diet. "

Just weight reduction for goodness sake. And patient is a vegetarian. And patient eats Roti Canai (2 pieces) frequently (which contributes to the high calorie diet that leads to her overweight). WHY hypoglycemia always makes me look stupid?! ARGHHH

Roopini told me that I was repeating and repeatingggg what patient has told me. Patient must be scratching her head looking at me. AHHH whenever I recalled the situation, I feel like slapping myself hard!

I even slept in the counselling room later on when it wasn't my turn to counsel. I do really feel like digging a hole to hide my face into the deep deep soil, after I gained back consciousness. Luckily there is no discrimination in class. My supervisor understands my issue, so she just asked me to be more careful and alert next time, in a very friendly way, fortunately :')

I hope my patient will not remember me *Opps

Headache

Less and less time for blogging. I am all so exhausted and frustrated with clinical posting in hospital.

It happened three days ago. I did not go for a heavy dinner. I just consumed Milo and Nestum oats for my dinner. There is no one to accompany me to go downstairs and eat. And also guess I was just too lazy to walk so far after a whole day in hospital.

At 10.30pm, I felt low, vision blurred. So took Milo and honey water to get myself back to normal sugar. After 30 minutes, checked again. 3.4mmol/L. Still feeling blur and uncomfort.

Okay fine. Drink Milo again. Eventually, headache starts hitting me. 

Never felt like this before. Headache so serious that I couldn't focus on all the things. 

So painful that I tried hitting the wall with my head.

At the end, I gave up. Took 2 tablets of Panadol (pain killer).

You may ask, why didn't I take pain killer in the beginning of headache?

I know why headache happened on me. Probably is due to the sudden rush of glucose to my brain cells.

I know Hypoglycemia has caused this to happen. Not some other reasons like fever. That's why I was afraid to take pain killer.

I wonder how many brain cells died on that night...That pain was really killing!

Beijing trip

Came back two days ago from Beijing. For a Malaysian, the weather in Beijing was very very tremendously cold.

In Malaysia, the average temperature is about 27 degree Celcius. And the warmest can go up to 33 degree Celcius.

And guess what happen to my sugar when I was at Beijing, where the temperature was 20 to 30 degree Celcius LOWER!

My body burnt sugar like crazy. I checked my sugar every 4 hours. hypo-checked again-hypo.  Forever getting a reading of < 4mmol/L. At the end of the day, I became PIK CIK (very frustrated).

Before I went Beijing, I read some articles saying that China's food is mainly carbohydrate food. Diabetics may tend to experience hyperglycemia, rather than hypoglycemia due to consumption of high carbo containing food. I ate the same amount of food, with less unit of insulin dose. at the end, hypo also! Blame the weather *narrowing eyes

Hence, I ate more food with less insulin dose for the first 2 days. Perhaps I was too happily eating carbo food without worrying. On the third day. Finally. The rumour of getting hyperglycemia (Guess maybe my body was starting to adapt to the lower temperature already).

Seriously, 5 years of relationship. Sometimes, I really don't quite understand you sugar.

After so long...

I am going Beijing on tomorrow. Midnight's flight. 

It's Chinese New Year first day already :)

And it is the first time I am not in Malaysia for CNY.

For me, what is CNY?

It is celebrating, greeting and not-so-my-style day (because I usually just hide at home)

It is eating and drinking all day long (Since I was diagnosed with T1DM, I never eat or drink like no body's business)

It is GAMBLE SEASON! (Yeah all I can remember is gambling. All cousins gathered in a circle and put money in front and start praying for good cards :p)

And after so long...

5 years, this is the first time I am travelling outside of Malaysia with T1DM in me.

I am kinda afraid.

Afraid of the airport security checking my needles.

Afraid of incidents of hypoglycemia.

Afraid of body not getting used to the currently cold weather in Beijing.

Afraid of all so troublesome things to do with my disease!

OMG. Calm down...It gonna be alright...

Anyhowww *being random

Another thing that has kept me excited for so longgg...

Finally I received my INSTAX MINI 8!

It is in a pretty pastel yellow colour. I am so in love with it :)

And I made an album for my instax :)

At last, please wish me a safe trip. Less haze and less cold in Beijing pleaseeee

Hormones

Insulin is a type of hormones. I myself, my poor pancreas no longer produces this hormone. So I have to take insulin from outside, through injections.

And what makes diabetes hard to control is I am a FEMALE.
I have other hormones like estrogen and progesterone that might interfere the efficiency of insulin in taking up glucose in blood. These estrogen and progesterone are especially high during ovulation period.

I guess during the PMS days, not only my MOOD is affected, my ACNE starts popping up and most important is my SUGAR is affected too!

Therefore, I have to decide on a higher unit of Insulatard (pre-bed insulin) for the time being. 

But, a higher unit of pre-bed insulin might cause NOCTURAL HYPOGLYCEMIA too.
This really frustrates me alots! ARGH!

p/s: PLEASE my dear hormones, you all are one big family which made up of polypeptides, for goodness sake, can't you all just treat each other well and fair?! *eye rolling sighed

Victim or Boss?

I wana be the latter.

I just need time and effort.
Please stay strong. He will not come to your dream tonight.

When I can't feel it anymore

At 10.30pm, I was reading some posts in Facebook.

I was feeling kinda sleepy but I 不以为意 (never bother about it).

Then, my mom came to my room asking me some questions that I couldn't respond.

Why I couldn't respond? Is her question too tricky? too hard?

I realised something must be wrong. Took my glucometer and pricked my finger.

This is what I had.

This reading explains why I thought her question was too tricky. I was totally confused!

Yes yes yes...I studied about the sign and symptoms of hypoglycemia. All on my finger tips.

There are:

• Cold sweating
• Trembling
• Blurred vision
• Anxiety
• Loss of consciousness and etc etc

But, what happened just now was NO SWEAT, NO SHAKE, NO BLURRED VISION.

This is Hypoglycemia Unawareness! Hypoglycemia is a DANGER.

And guess how creepy it is when you are unaware of a danger.

Hypo is very creepyyyy!

I went downstairs to have a ace-light Yakult and 3 Tablespoon of honey drink. 

1/2 hour later, this is what I got.

Okay, so I went to have 3 Tbsp of honey drink again. 

And now at 12.00am, my sugar went up to almost reaching the sky of  8.2mmol!

Very interesting. you creepy.

Never stop believing

I couldn't sleep yesterday night until 5am this morning only I can sleep.

P/S: Was hugging bolster. Crying hard. Guess I just miss him.

Now I am crying again watching this video.

I have goosebumps watching this. Every second touches my heart. *Isn't she beautiful? :')

T1DM is living with pokes, needles and pain everyday.

T1DM is difficult to be spontaneous.

T1DM is a 24/7 battle.

T1DM makes our lives different

Insulin is not a cure. But a treatment to keep us alive.

There is no cure for T1DM. But, NEVER STOP BELIEVING!

Recycling strip boxes

One day I will use up 2 test strips. Within 2 weeks I will finish one box of 25 test strips.

So,       1 month     = 50 strips

            1 year        = 600 strips = 24 boxes

5 years of being diabetic, I should have stored about 120 boxes! Woohoo I like this number! :p

Unfortunately, I threw away most of them. And now suddenly I thought of storing them can be good.

Why good? Let me list down things that I can do with them.

1) Sweet tooth box- I can simpan (keep) all my milk tooth in these test strip boxes. Then at night, my tooth fairy will come hehe :p

2) Crafts and arts- I should have done some art work with these boxes. Honestly these boxes are of really good quality :)

3) Store coins?

4) Store cotton wool?

5) Store errrr secret paper notes?

Somemore what I can do with these boxes, instead of throwing them away. Hmmm...let me think...

Let's pray for good reading tomorrow

I have left only ONE strip. And I just agak-agak (roughly) estimate my sugar level now and decided on 14unit of insulatard.

That ONE strip left is for early morning tomorrow to check if hyperglycemia again (touch wood)

And I do not want hypo also. I hate hypo the most early in the morning because I look like a dumbo and nobody likes me and they stare at me and they blame me when I am hypo.

Please sugar, be good to me.

Okay pray hard.

First post

Alright. Year 2013 and I am starting my first post today

Would like to share about my feelings and my daily routine being a Type 1 diabetic, after 5 years being diabetic haha

Hope it is not too late :)